I think I completely missed fall. I was excited beyond words to see autumn coming and was ready to cook all my favorite heavy, scrumptious foods; Ready to decorate for the season, carve pumpkins and play in the leaves.
I think it was sometime in September, toward the end, that time got away from me. I had to look at the date of my last post in September to see when it actually was.
We started some slight renovations here at the Hearth Room, totally on a whim, of course! I mean really, if you know me, is there any other way? So we were determined to make some quick little changes in the kitchen and hearth room and wrap it up in time to decorate for fall when the phone rang late on a Friday night. A new nurse that wasn't very familiar with our family was calling to tell me my grandfather wasn't well. As it was very difficult to get anyone to make even a bit of sense over the phone, I felt it best to throw some things together and pack the little people in the car so I could see for myself what was going on.
As it was, it came down to vocabulary. Dehydration to the current hospice caregiver meant my grandfather was at his end. To me, dehydration meant we need some fluids. And by the way... how is it that all of a sudden my grandfather is dehydrated anyway... with caregivers present....? But that's a different topic entirely. My grandfather had just recently received a new diagnosis and was sent home with hospice care, although we all felt it was a bit premature at that point. I'm sure I could offend a myriad by simply discussing our experience with hospice, but we have to keep in mind that people have good and bad experiences everywhere. With that said, it was just unfortunate that we had a change in nursing care during this time.
A trip to the hospital and some fluid was all it took to rejuvenate this strong gentleman once again. All was well, with grandparents both in good spirits and my little people ecstatic to be there among family, as well as being close to the shore. A little time was spent near one of our favorite beachy places that just happens to have one of the coolest-ever-puzzle-stores, an all-things-British store, and a truly great toy shop. And then there was the new discovery of the lovely Nectar, shown above. I LOVE juicing. Love it. There is nothing that can make you feel better quicker than introducing some extremely fresh, nutrient rich juice into your system! And given the stress handed to us those past few days, Nectar really was a blessing! Not to mention the fact that I also felt better simply sitting there in that café and looking at the plates hanging on the walls and the aprons... Ah. Comfort.
So, I decided it would be best if I hung around and helped look after my grandparents for a week to make sure things kept looking up. I'm very glad I did since things only seemed to get more complicated as time went on.
Do you know what it's like when something happens in your life to cause great emotion, but you need to bury it or cover it up and just keep going at that time for the sake of those around you? Yet all the while you know you need to feel what's happening and be in it and let it be a part of you. Then it's so hard to return to that flood of emotion later. It's like looking at something through water. You can see it, it's all familiar, yet blurry and kind of distant. That's what it's like for me now.
I have some of the most touching memories of my life from the 6 or so weeks that I spent with my grandparents. We talked about so many good memories and had to face some of the worst. But I want to remember all of it. Every minute detail, every word or utterance. The lighting, the season. If it doesn't help to make us who we are, then it certainly will remind us, won't it?